Christmas In the Goblin Kingdom
by ALadyofStardust
Summary: In which Jareth basically lives out his Love Actually dreams and Sarah can't skate worth a damn. Christmas Fic. **Part of the Apartment-verse. Please see my profile for story order**


Sarah sat looking out her front window, a steaming cup of tea in her hands. The snow had been falling for hours and showed no signs of stopping. The christmas lights blinked out from under the snow, making them look like fairies hidden under blankets. Her playlist was looping the classic Mariah Carey song as she waited for her friends to arrive. It was, for all intents and purposes, the perfect Christmas Eve.

Her Dad hadn't taken the family on a cruise this year so it was easy enough for her to go home and spend the evening with her family, but she shrugged them off citing a promise to spend Christmas Eve with the friends she was with last year.

Besides, she didn't relish sleeping in Karen's sister Irene's basement on an old futon while her three cats yowled into the night. No, she'd have a nice quiet Christmas Eve with her friends, and then she'd go over tomorrow morning. Then she might only have to hear six hours of Irene talking about Avon products, Karen prattling on about What Sarah Was Going to Do With Her Life, and Irene's creepy son Phillip trying to goad her into political debates.

Nah, she chose Scrabble and wine.

She heard the telltale bell from the kitchen and bit her lip in anticipation. It only ever rang when he stepped through. She was thrilled that he'd agreed to join them this year and save her the dramafest of dealing with a moping magical king.

"I hope you're dressed warmly Sarah!" he called from the kitchen.

Sarah abandoned her ludo-fur blanket and poked her head into the kitchen. She found Jareth in full winter dress. He'd swapped his telltale Goblin King garb for a fur lined cape and gloves. He wasn't wearing a hat but the tops of his boots peaked through with fleece. He was also holding ice skates. Two pairs in fact.

"I have a surprise," he trilled, eyes sparkling with mischief.

"Is the surprise ice skating," Sarah asked, wryly.

He wagged a finger at her.

"You will need more layers than that precious."

He spun his hand and a snowball appeared there. Sarah held up her mug to shield her face. "Jareth!" she cried.

But instead of getting hit by a torrent of snow, he blew it towards her, the snowball dissolving into powdery glitter. Sarah's outfit magically featured her winter jacket, gloves, hat, and warmest leggings. The skates were on her feet but he'd thought to add guards to protect her kitchen floor and the (frankly long since forfeited) security deposit.

"What was that?" she asked grabbing the counter for purchase.

"A little Christmas magic," he said, extending his hand towards her. She took it, as he guided them backwards through the mirror.

She had never gone back through the mirror with him before. She usually was heading through it specifically to see him. Previously, she couldn't get through very often, major holidays and anytime she felt particularly upset seemed to be the exceptions, but lately things had changed and the mirror seemed to work almost all the time now. With him guiding them, the already instantaneous trip went even smoother and there was no stumble or kick back that she felt when she was by herself.

Every other time she'd come through the mirror into some part of his castle. Sarah assumed it was because the only mirrors were in the castle, but this time they landed on the recently frozen over bog.

"What on earth?" said Sarah, looking around. The bog was covered in snow and ice, the smell completely gone. The stench appeared to be trapped under the ice. Along with what looked like a few goblins happily swimming along and a grotesque looking nymph.

"Do you like it?" he asked, and Sarah could see the slight apprehension in his eyes.

"Is this safe?" she asked still holding onto his hand. "It doesn't even snow in the Goblin Kingdom."

"Ah yes," said Jareth a little guiltily. "I begged another favor from a cranky queen. I'll probably have to torment some troublesome English children but nothing I'm not used to."

Sarah looked at the icicles hanging from the snow covered brambles and looking upward she noticed a flurry of suspended crystals all filled with magical snow, swirling around their heads.

"Oh well played Goblin King," she conceded. "But one flaw in the plan, I haven't skated since I was ten, and I remember none of it."

Jareth grinned, waving the guards from her skates and took hold of her other hand. Sarah shrieked as he brought them into a spin. "Good thing I'm an excellent skater then isn't it?"

He pulled her in as he slid to an abrupt start. It was a good thing he was holding her as Sarah's feet tried to slide out from under her. He caught her under the arms and pulled her back up.

"Goddammit," she muttered. "Do you have to be good at everything?"

"I don't have to," he replied turning around taking her hands again. "I just am."

"Whatever, at least I can write an email without shorting out an entire city block," she snarked.

He began to skate backwards and slowly pulled Sarah around the bog with him.

"That was completely coincidental," he breezed. "I do not need email to communicate with anyone, I have magic."

As Sarah watched the crystals twirling in the Christmas night sky, she had to give it up to magic right at that moment.

"When I was a boy, I used to enjoy standing at the top of that hill, the one you first saw the Labyrinth from, and look over my kingdom," he said, skating smoothly. "I couldn't see all of it of course, patently impossible, but the Labyrinth was always my favourite part. I would walk it every day, trying to discover all of its secrets."

"Did you ever discover them all?" she asked, curious.

"No," he laughed. "It cannot be done. The Labyrinth is always changing. But just when I think I'm not getting anywhere I realize-"

"-you are." she finished for him.

"I am," he repeated. "But I must admit, this is my first time ice skating on the bog."

"Then how are you so good at it?" she asked as her legs wobbled unsteadily.

"It is my first time skating on the bog, not ice skating ever. Back years ago, before your lot had so many buildings, I would go Above and skate on your ponds, your rivers, and your oceans."

"Wait, you skated on the _ocean_?"

"Yes, a little magic helped of course, but there's something beyond even magic at being able to glide across the ice and look down at a whale swimming peacefully underneath."

"Oh my god, you _have_ to take me to do that. Jareth seriously," she said, playfully trying to swat his hand without falling, "don't hold out on me here."

"Hold out on you?"

"Yeah, it's just an expression, it means keep me from living my new dream of skating on the back of a blue whale."

Jareth laughed as they ducked under the low hanging tree branches. Sarah's foot slipped but Jareth was fast and spun around to catch her.

"I'm fine Jareth," she said irritably, she could have sworn she'd remember more of her lessons, instead of defaulting to bambi on ice.

"Just keeping you from cracking your head open again. You and ice do not have the best track record I'm afraid."

"Yeah," Sarah said straightening. He kept one hand on her hip and Sarah let him. "I keep forgetting to ask, what the hell was even in that tea you gave me?"

"Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to," he replied, guiding them through another archway.

They skated around the pond for a while. Jareth guiding her the whole way. He had to catch her a couple more times but he didn't seem to mind. She was having a hard time minding it either. Sarah thought she might do better if he let her skate on her own, but she didn't really want to let go of his hand. After he took her through another figure eight she realized she'd forgotten something.

"Are we going back shortly? I don't want to keep my friends waiting. Christmas Eve only comes once a year and they look forward to our hang out session."

She didn't really want to leave, but Jareth's hand was so warm on her hip and he was so close. She knew how this song ended and it wasn't going to end well. At least Scrabble was safe. Ludo would kick their asses and Hoggle would get drunk off her homemade mulled wine and everyone would laugh and then go home to sleep in their own beds, nothing broken, nothing risked, nothing lost.

"Did you know I have no siblings?"

"No…" Sarah said confused.

"Yes, it's not unusual for the high families to only have one child. But there were times I desperately wished for a sibling. You're very lucky to have Toby you know."

"Can we sit down for a while?" she asked. "My legs are getting kind of tired."

"Of course," he led them over to the newly rebuilt bridge. Jareth removed his cape and laid it out for them to sit on. Sarah sat, her skates dangling over the bog. It was beautiful now, but she'd never forget just how awful it had smelt while she swayed over it, positive she was going to meet a smelly end.

"My parents died years before you were even born. My father passed when I was scarcely finished my education. Leaving me the throne, I am fairly certain he timed his death to coincide with it, and my mother died two centuries ago now. I have been ostensibly, on my own since then."

"Why are you telling me all this?" she asked, in confusion.

"I spoke to Sir Didymus," he said with a sigh.

"You - you spoke with Sir Didymus?" Sarah was … shocked to say the least. She'd always gotten the impression that Jareth merely tolerated her friends so speaking with one of them in confidence was unexpected.

"Yes, I felt he would be the most sympathetic to my cause and ultimately the most helpful," he answered.

"What did you talk about?" she was really hoping it was about bog bridge structures, but somehow doubted it.

"About you Sarah."

"Of course," she muttered under her breath.

"You misunderstand," he said taking her gloved hand in his. "I asked him for…help."

It was a good thing she was sitting because she would have fallen right on her ass hearing that if she'd still been on the ice.

"You? You asked Sir Didymus for _help_? I have no words."

"Good then maybe you'll let me get one in edgewise," he teased. "Yes I went to him for help with you. I never know where I stand with you Sarah. Sometimes I think … well, it doesn't really matter. But the little fox had a few suggestions where the matters of you are concerned.

"He told me that the best thing I could do for you this Christmas would be to do less. That the … gifts I tried to give you last year were misguided because they missed the thing you wanted most. Which was to spend time with the people who cared about you. That magic didn't impress you, but thoughtfulness always did. That sometimes I can get so caught up with being the Goblin King that it can be hard for you to separate the man from the title."

"You got all of this from Sir Didymus," she said skeptical.

"More or less," he said waving a hand. "I may have made a few assumptions."

"Well, you're not wrong," she conceded. "But this is beautiful. Just enough magic without being over the top. Also it's not going to result in more angry calls from my poor landlord asking why it sounds like I have an army of dogs all trying to sing deck the halls in my living room. Though, it ultimately doesn't matter the difference between Jareth and the Goblin King, you're one in the same and always will be."

"I am the Goblin King true," he agreed, "and I will be the Goblin King for as long as I live. It is a title I was born into and one I take very seriously. But sometimes it asks me to make decisions I would not otherwise make. To choose between what's right and what's nice."

"And right must always win," she nodded. "I know that there are things I'll never understand about your world."

"Ah, you've reached the point of our discussion. I want you to understand."

"Why does it matter if I understand," she asked puzzled.

"Well you see Sarah," he said clearing his throat. "When you love someone, you have the terrible urge to help them understand you, in the hope that you might be loved back."

"You…you love me?" she asked half seriously and half joking.

"I should think you've known that for quite some time," he said calmly. Yet she could tell he was anything but. His index finger thrummed a beat on his thigh as he allowed himself this small outlet for his nerves. Sarah didn't say anything.

"I love you Sarah," he said clearly. Just in case she had missed it the first time.

Of course, _of course_ she knew he loved her. But it was the kind of thing that was tucked deep in her mind. The kind of thing she didn't think about too hard in the hopes that it would go away. She could ignore it as long as it was hidden. But he wasn't letting her ignore it anymore.

She'd thought they had a truce. Neither of them had said anything since the last time they'd spoken about this. But he'd also never said the words. Without the words, it was just an idea, a completely unprovable thing that could still fall under the heading of 'maybe not as serious as she thought'.

"How long?" she choked out. "How long have you loved me?"

"I…I don't know," he said, brow furrowing in confusion.

"Since before?" she asked, quietly.

They both understood what she was referring to. Did he love her in that ill fated ballroom? Was it tactical or something else? He'd answered it once, but not properly and she had to know. She needed to hear him say it, just like he'd needed to tell her those words.

"No," he replied quickly but firmly. "Not since before. I suppose, if I had to pinpoint the moment things changed, when I began to think of you as more than a runner, it was a few years later. During your university years. Sir Didymus came to me for one reason or another and I noticed he was wearing a hideous scarf that was not part of his uniform. I inquired where he obtained the scarf and he told me you'd made it for him. it seems his previous scarf was particularly threadbare and for Christmas that year you gave him a new scarf and mittens. I asked him why you would give him such a gift and he explained that you were friends and friends took care of each other.

"So I sent for the dwarf. I wanted to know what gifts you'd given him and I was equally surprised to learn he'd given you gifts in return. Items from my kingdom, items he had worked hard to obtain. I asked him the same question. Why. He said he loved you. That you were the first person to ever love him and care for him.

"I then asked Sir Didymus to report on any event involving inter spacial travel. What you did, what earned you their love and gifts and what they did to earn yours. Do you know what I found?"

"No," she answered, quietly.

"I found that you played board games. That you put on music and danced to it. That you would simply listen to them and they in turn to you.

"Do you want to know something interesting Sarah? I've had 894,331 runners in my lifetime as Goblin King. 894,331 and it's the one, it's that single one who looked at the people of my kingdom. Who looked at her journey and said "not enough". None of the other 894 330 runners were ever able to remember my kingdom. They didn't remember me, they did not remember the creatures they met along the way and if they had lost, they didn't remember the child. Even those that won only remembered that they nearly lost the child and how precious they were.

"It's not unusual for runners to make friends, and sometimes these friends even help them beat the labyrinth. If they're particularly strong willed, they might be able to hold onto these friends and their memories for a few years. But it all fades away as soon as life crouches in and makes them inconvenient.

"But you were the first to remember us. All of us. And instead of running from it or letting yourself believe it was all just a dream, you made them scarves because you noticed they were chilly in winter.

"Do you have any idea what that meant to them? Do you have any idea what sort of chaos those scarves caused for the rest of my kingdom? The goblins were so jealous that I had to give away scarves to all of them just so they'd leave you alone for five minutes."

"Wait," Sarah interjected. "So back when all my scarves went missing that was goblins?"

"Yes, this would also be around the time that the goblins started visiting you whenever they could. Because they wanted you to love them too. It is…very difficult living in a kingdom as isolated as ours. They can get lonely and then you come along.

"This girl, who tore down their homes and upended my castle, and they loved you.

"It is because of you we now have Christmas in the Goblin Kingdom you know. This is all because of you. They saw your christmas gifts to your friends and decided they also wanted to give gifts. I've intercepted the majority of the gifts that would come your way, largely consisting of particularly interesting shaped dung and tankards of homemade goblin ale, but some wrote you notes. I made sure you received those."

Sarah remembered those notes. She still got them every year and kept them all in a drawer. She couldn't read them, many of them weren't even much more than paw prints on a page, but she knew how important it was to the goblins that she got the notes. She had assumed it was Sir Didymus' idea or maybe Ludo's.

"So I suppose the answer to your question is Sarah, I didn't love you before. But a part of me has loved you since I saw that ugly, poorly made scarf tied around the fox's neck.

"You're special Sarah. Not because you're beautiful, you already know that. Not because you won and not because you don't love me back. But because every day you wake up and believe. Everyday, despite knowing how much easier your life would be. How much better it would have turned out had you never needed to deal with Goblin Kings, you still believe. You still love them. Despite me and despite what it costs you. It all comes back to you. Everything, everyone, comes back to you."

 _A crap_ , she thought. She'd swear she could physically feel the last remaining shred of common sense depart.

"My life would be easier if you weren't in it." she said quietly and Jareth nodded in response.

"Of course."

"No, let me finish," she said getting louder. "My life would be easier but it wouldn't be better. How…how could it be better?"

Sarah was pretty sure she saw Jareth's heart stop in that moment. Hers had stopped a few minutes ago.

"It's…you're treating love like it's a zero sum game. You talk like you're nothing to me like we're nothing to each other unless we're both a hundred-percent-all-in-jumping-into-the-deep-end with each other and that's just not how it works. You can't make declarations like that and assume it's yes or no. I'm figuring it out, we're figuring it out. But let me tell you about some things that _you_ may not know.

"Like did you know that I trust you?" He finally met her eyes when she said this. She was right, he didn't know that. "Yeah, I trust you Jareth. I trust you more than...maybe anyone else in this world. And did you know you're my closest friend? Don't really know how that happened but it's true. I love Hoggle, I love Ludo and I love Sir Didymus and I will go to the ends of the earth to protect them. But you're my best friend. You're the person I want to talk to about my day. You're the one who understands why after thirteen years Karen's and my relationship is still strained. You're the one who doesn't judge me for still loving my mom even after everything. You don't needle me about my job or my crappy apartment or ask what I'm doing with my life.

"You just listen to me and even when I'm being a brat, and yeah, I know sometimes I can be a brat, but you listen anyways. More than that you care. Do you know what that means to me? Do you know how much I value that?"

"No, I did not," he answered evenly.

"Or how about the fact that I haven't even so much as looked at a guy after the Andrew fiasco? How every time you kiss me it's the hardest thing - every damn time it's the _hardest thing_ to walk away from."

She took a breath, as long as she was getting things out there, she may as well put them all out there.

"Now let's get to the big one, the reason I haven't told you I love you. Because listen up you myopic angst sponge, I do love you. I love you deeply. I'm not even sure I've ever...it doesn't matter. I'm in love with you with a capital L. But I can't tell you that I love you because you wouldn't hear what I'm saying. I still need some time and some space. I still need to figure out how to do the love thing with you. So maybe I don't love you the way you want me to love you. But I do love you.

Sarah saw his fist tighten around the edge of the bridge. She'd long ago learned his tells. He was trying to suppress the urge to do something he'd regret later. She suspected it had something to do with stopping her from saying anything else.

"You're not the only one who can make a big speech. I'm sorry if it's cruel that I'm not willing to go the distance just yet but if you ever want me to love you that way…you gotta be patient. I get that it's not in your nature. I know that you're trying to respect my boundaries, but I think you're not being fair to what I am giving you. Which is considerably more than a chance by this point.

"Though admittedly I didn't know about the everyone forgetting their time in the Labyrinth after they left. That's new. Were you ever gonna share that with me?"

He hadn't said a word and had barely moved a muscle while she was talking. Sarah was hoping to turn it back to him with her last question letting them both move on but he wouldn't bite.

"It is difficult for me to be patient but it's only because my life is so long Sarah. I've waited a very long time for you and it's hard to see you sitting there, telling me you love me and not be able to do anything about it. To not feel like we've already wasted so much time. Time that could be spent together."

Sarah gave a derisive snort before gesturing around the magically lit up, frozen bog.

"And what's this then if not spending time together? Are you aware that since I invited you back into my life I've seen you on average at least three times a week? That whenever I see you we always spend the whole evening together and sometimes it's fun, like tonight, tonight was fun. And other times it's infuriating, like what happened with my dvd player, or my phone, or really any piece of tech I let you touch for more than five minutes."

"Humans survived for millennia without needing those infernal devices, I don't know why you so insist on keeping them," he muttered under his breath.

"Well I do, and if you go near my electric mixer again you're going to need to clean up more than splattered cake batter," she joked poking him in the ribs.

"So what do we do now?" he asked seriously.

She shrugged. "I don't really know. What do you want to do?"

"I want to kiss you," he replied with a hint of his telltale smirk.

"Then I think you should do that," she nodded in mock seriousness.

He smiled and took her face between his gloved hands. Her cheeks grew warm as he leaned in and kissed her.

They'd kissed plenty of times. Sometimes those times might have gone a little too far, but tonight he was happy to just kiss her. It was gentler than any of their other kisses had ever been. Soft and quiet, like taking a deep breath of fresh air. Sarah knew that if she was basing her decisions solely on how she felt when he kissed her, she'd have been long gone by now. But if she ever wanted him to be more than a story she told her grandchildren, he was right, they'd need to come to an understanding and finally, it felt like they might.

For now though, she was happy to kiss him, under the glow of the magic he'd spun just for her. But even if he'd just curled up on her couch to play board games with her, she thought that would have been enough. Christmas Eve had a magic of its own. But Jareth never did anything by halves.

She pulled away slowly. Aware that he wouldn't let her go so easily. But she was surprised that he followed her lead and retreated. Her face was flushed and despite the cold she was feeling very warm indeed.

"How do you feel about turkey?" she asked, slightly more out of breath than she thought.

"Turkey," he asked puzzled. "As in the fowl?"

"Yeah, Irene - Karen's sister, is kind of a pill, but she knows how to dress a bird. I'm supposed to go over there for Christmas dinner and honestly, there's always way too much food given that Karen eats four bites and then declares herself full. So if you'd want to come…I'd like that," she finished lamely.

Jareth broke out into a grin. "I would love some turkey."

"Great," she said happily, leaning into him. "Toby will be thrilled. He keeps asking when you're coming by, apparently he hasn't forgotten anything either. But if you really love me, you'll pretend you helped me babysit him once and leave it at that. When he's older, we'll let him decide how much magic he wants in his life."

He draped an arm around her shoulders and she snuggled in closer.

"I love you Sarah," he said and kissed the top of her head. "Happy Christmas."

"I love you too," she said smiling. "Merry Christmas Jareth - but please get these skates off me, my feet are killing me."

"Nonsense," he waved his free hand. "Your skating lesson isn't over yet."

As Sarah turned to look back at the ice she noticed familiar figures coming over the hill, carrying their own pairs of skates. Except for Hoggle, who seemed to have brought a sled instead.

"Okay," she said, barely able to conceal her delight. "You win this round Goblin King."

She hopped back on the ice and held out her hand for him to take.

"Come on, I'm obviously not going to be going anywhere without you."

He jumped down pulling her forward towards her friends.

Yeah, she thought, if there was a better way to spend Christmas she didn't know it.

* * *

A/N: Fluffy nonsense. But like I had a choice here. Just imagine the scene in Love Actually where the guy holds up the note cards, that's what basically happened to me. Except it was Jareth and instead of my front door it was my brain. When I originally started writing this series I had very different plans for where it was going to go (to be clear, this series isn't over).

I imagined Jareth and Sarah starting a friends with benefits type relationship where Sarah really enjoyed sleeping with Jareth, but wasn't interested in a romantic relationship with him or anyone else and Jareth's attempts to convince her otherwise. Obviously this is not how it developed. I still think that's a good story but these fools let me know that its not their story.

If you're following this series you know that I write the stories out of order, but this seemed important. Everything comes back to Christmas with these idiots. So I had to give them this one. We could all use a little fluffy nonsense after this year. Merry Christmas ye merry goblins.


End file.
